hn-classics/_stories/2006/8929879.md

---
created_at: '2015-01-22T16:11:43.000Z'
title: My First BillG Review (2006)
url: http://www.joelonsoftware.com/items/2006/06/16.html
author: sahilkhosla
points: 78
story_text: ''
comment_text: 
num_comments: 13
story_id: 
story_title: 
story_url: 
parent_id: 
created_at_i: 1421943103
_tags:
- story
- author_sahilkhosla
- story_8929879
objectID: '8929879'
year: 2006

---
In the olden days, Excel had a very awkward programming language without
a name. “Excel Macros,” we called it. It was a severely dysfunctional
programming language without variables (you had to store values in cells
on a worksheet), without locals, without subroutine calls: in short it
was almost completely unmaintainable. It had advanced features like
“Goto” but the labels were actually physically invisible.

The only thing that made it look reasonable was that it looked great
compared to Lotus macros, which were nothing more than a sequence of
keystrokes entered as a long string into a worksheet cell.

On June 17, 1991, I started working for Microsoft on the Excel team. My
title was “Program Manager.” I was supposed to come up with a solution
to this problem. The implication was that the solution would have
something to do with the Basic programming language.

Basic? Yech\!

I spend some time negotiating with various development groups. Visual
Basic 1.0 had just come out, and it was pretty friggin’ cool. There was
a misguided effort underway with the code name MacroMan, and another
effort to make Object-Oriented Basic code-named “Silver.” The Silver
team was told that they had one client for their product: Excel. The
marketing manager for Silver, Bob Wyman, yes that Bob Wyman, had only
one person he had to sell his technology to: me.

MacroMan was, as I said, misguided, and it took some persuading, but it
was eventually shut down. The Excel team convinced the Basic team that
what we really needed was some kind of Visual Basic for Excel. I managed
to get four pet features added to Basic. I got them to add Variants, a
union data type that could hold any other type, because otherwise you
couldn’t store the contents of  a spreadsheet cell in a variable without
a switch statement. I got them to add late binding, which became known
as IDispatch, a.k.a. COM Automation, because the original design for
Silver required a deep understanding of type systems that the kinds of
people who program macros don’t care about. And I got two pet syntactic
features into the language: **For Each**, stolen from csh, and **With**,
stolen from Pascal.

Then I sat down to write the Excel Basic spec, a huge document that grew
to hundreds of pages. I think it was 500 pages by the time it was done.
(“Waterfall,” you snicker; yeah yeah shut up.)

In those days we used to have these things called BillG reviews.
Basically every major important feature got reviewed by Bill Gates. I
was told to send a copy of my spec to his office in preparation for the
review. It was basically one ream of laser-printed paper.

I rushed to get the spec printed and sent it over to his office.

Later that day, I had some time, so I started working on figuring out if
Basic had enough date and time functions to do all the things you could
do in Excel.

In most modern programming environments, dates are stored as real
numbers. The integer part of the number is the number of days since some
agreed-upon date in the past, called the epoch. In Excel, today’s date,
June 16, 2006, is stored as 38884, counting days where January 1st, 1900
is 1.

I started working through the various date and time functions in Basic
and the date and time functions in Excel, trying things out, when I
noticed something strange in the Visual Basic documentation: Basic uses
December 31, 1899 as the epoch instead of January 1, 1900, but for some
reason, today’s date was the same in Excel as it was in Basic.

Huh?

I went to find an Excel developer who was old enough to remember why. Ed
Fries seemed to know the answer.

“Oh,” he told me. “Check out February 28th, 1900.”

“It’s 59,” I said.

“Now try March 1st.”

“It’s 61\!”

“What happened to 60?” Ed asked.

“February 29th. 1900 was a leap year\! It’s divisible by 4\!”

“Good guess, but no cigar,” Ed said, and left me wondering for a while.

Oops. I did some research. Years that are divisible by 100 are not leap
years, unless they’re also divisible by 400.

1900 wasn’t a leap year.

“It’s a bug in Excel\!” I exclaimed.

“Well, not really,” said Ed. “We had to do it that way because we need
to be able to import Lotus 123 worksheets.”

“So, it’s a bug in Lotus 123?”

“Yeah, but probably an intentional one. Lotus had to fit in 640K. That’s
not a lot of memory. If you ignore 1900, you can figure out if a given
year is a leap year just by looking to see if the rightmost two bits are
zero. That’s really fast and easy. The Lotus guys probably figured it
didn’t matter to be wrong for those two months way in the past. It looks
like the Basic guys wanted to be anal about those two months, so they
moved the epoch one day back.”

“Aargh\!” I said, and went off to study why there was a checkbox in the
options dialog called **1904 Date System**.

The next day was the big BillG review.

June 30, 1992.

In those days, Microsoft was a lot less bureaucratic. Instead of the 11
or 12 layers of management they have today, I reported to Mike Conte who
reported to Chris Graham who reported to Pete Higgins, who reported to
Mike Maples, who reported to Bill. About 6 layers from top to bottom. We
made fun of companies like General Motors with their eight layers of
management or whatever it was.

In my BillG review meeting, the whole reporting hierarchy was there,
along with their cousins, sisters, and aunts, and a person who came
along from my team whose whole job during the meeting was to keep an
accurate count of how many times Bill said the F word. The lower the
f\*\*\*-count, the better.

Bill came in.

I thought about how strange it was that he had two legs, two arms, one
head, etc., almost exactly like a regular human being.

He had my spec in his hand.

He had my spec in his hand\!

He sat down and exchanged witty banter with an executive I did not know
that made no sense to me. A few people laughed.

Bill turned to me.

I noticed that there were comments in the margins of my spec. He had
read the first page\!

He had read the first page of my spec and written little notes in the
margin\!

Considering that we only got him the spec about 24 hours earlier, he
must have read it the night before.

He was asking questions. I was answering them. They were pretty easy,
but I can’t for the life of me remember what they were, because I
couldn’t stop noticing that he was flipping through the spec…

He was flipping through the spec\! \[Calm down, what are you a little
girl?\]

… and THERE WERE NOTES IN ALL THE MARGINS. ON EVERY PAGE OF THE SPEC. HE
HAD READ THE WHOLE GODDAMNED THING AND WRITTEN NOTES IN THE MARGINS.

He Read The Whole Thing\! \[OMG SQUEEE\!\]

The questions got harder and more detailed.

They seemed a little bit random. By now I was used to thinking of Bill
as my buddy. He’s a nice guy\! He read my spec\! He probably just wants
to ask me a few questions about the comments in the margins\! I’ll open
a bug in the bug tracker for each of his comments and makes sure it gets
addressed, pronto\!

Finally the killer question.

“I don’t know, you guys,” Bill said, “Is anyone really looking into all
the details of how to do this? Like, all those date and time functions.
Excel has so many date and time functions. Is Basic going to have the
same functions? Will they all work the same way?”

“Yes,” I said, “except for January and February, 1900.”

Silence.

The f\*\*\* counter and my boss exchanged astonished glances. How did I
know that? January and February WHAT?

“OK. Well, good work,” said Bill. He took his marked up copy of the spec

…wait\! I wanted that…

and left.

“Four,” announced the f\*\*\* counter, and everyone said, “wow, that’s
the lowest I can remember. Bill is getting mellow in his old age.” He
was, you know, 36.

Later I had it explained to me. “Bill doesn’t really want to review your
spec, he just wants to make sure you’ve got it under control. His
standard M.O. is to ask harder and harder questions until you admit that
you don’t know, and then he can yell at you for being unprepared. Nobody
was really sure what happens if you answer the hardest question he can
come up with because it’s never happened before.”

“Can you imagine if Jim Manzi had been in that meeting?” someone asked.
“‘What’s a date function?’ Manzi would have asked.”

Jim Manzi was the MBA-type running Lotus into the ground.

It was a good point. Bill Gates was amazingly technical. He understood
Variants, and COM objects, and IDispatch and why Automation is different
than vtables and why this might lead to dual interfaces. He worried
about date functions. He didn’t meddle in software if he trusted the
people who were working on it, but you couldn’t bullshit him for a
minute because he was a programmer. A real, actual, programmer.

Watching non-programmers trying to run software companies is like
watching someone who doesn’t know how to surf trying to surf.

“It’s ok\! I have great advisors standing on the shore telling me what
to do\!” they say, and then fall off the board, again and again. The
standard cry of the MBA who believes that management is a generic
function. Is Ballmer going to be another John Sculley, who nearly drove
Apple into extinction because the board of directors thought that
selling Pepsi was good preparation for running a computer company? The
cult of the MBA likes to believe that you can run organizations that do
things that you don’t understand.

Over the years, Microsoft got big, Bill got overextended, and some shady
ethical decisions made it necessary to devote way too much management
attention to fighting the US government. Steve took over the CEO role on
the theory that this would allow Bill to spend more time doing what he
does best, running the software development organization, but that
didn’t seem to fix endemic problems caused by those 11 layers of
management, a culture of perpetual, permanent meetings, a stubborn
insistance on creating every possible product no matter what, (how many
billions of dollars has Microsoft lost, in R\&D, legal fees, and damage
to reputation, because they decided that not only do they have to make a
web browser, but they have to give it away free?), and a couple of
decades of sloppy, rapid hiring has ensured that the brainpower of the
median Microsoft employee has gone way down (Douglas Coupland, in
Microserfs: “They hired 3,100 people in 1992 alone, and you know not all
of them were gems.”)

Oh well. The party has moved elsewhere. Excel Basic became Microsoft
Visual Basic for Applications for Microsoft Excel, with so many (TM)’s
and (R)’s I don’t know where to put them all. I left the company in
1994, assuming Bill had completely forgotten me, until I noticed a short
interview with Bill Gates in the Wall Street Journal, in which he
mentioned, almost in passing, something along the lines of how hard it
was to recruit, say, a good program manager for Excel. They don’t just
grow on trees, or something.

Could he have been talking about me? Naw, it was probably someone else.

Still.